Forever Love Blooms When…

Forever love blooms when …

two people come together and learn to work together as a TEAM. While working as a team,  side-by-side, in one accord in purpose and direction, they develop strong feelings of warm personal attachment. A feeling of being connected with the person who SEES you.

Here’s the thing about people who are truly in love: They SEE each other. They know each other as best friends, and that’s what we all crave in a lover is to be SEEN and to be really DEEPLY KNOWN and UNDERSTOOD. And if you have that with someone, then THAT’S EVERYTHING!

But how does one achieve that special connection with another human being who is as flawed as we are? Where do we even start?

Through education.

First, discover what true love IS and IS NOT.

There are four components to love. To reach the level of true love, couples must incorporate all four components to form a cohesive, unbreakable, bond as “One” Team.

  1. philia – (brotherly love) love of family members i.e. mother, father, sisters, brothers.
  2. storge‘ – love between friends i.e. workmates, girlfriends, others
  3. eros – love between a man and a woman (sexual love)
  4. agape‘ – love guided by principles of what is right and in the best interest of the family. It is love that is an unselfish devotion and sincere concern for the lasting welfare of the mate, along with an active expression of this for everyone’s good.

hearts and candlesWe want our Soulmate as our closest relative (Philia). Our best friend (Storge’) Our fervent lover (Eros) Our most ardent supporter (Agape).  We’re off to a great start … But more is involved.

 Love also includes Emotional and Spiritual Support

The tri-fold bond of intimacy helps bond two people as One in unity of purpose:

  • Passion. Indeed, if this chemistry does not exist, the going can be rough. But sexual passion alone cannot sustain a successful relationship. It’s imperative to understand just where and when sex enters the picture because it is just one-third of the equation.
  • Emotional support – is on equal footing with passion. It means being on the same wavelength with your partner, seeing eye-to-eye, looking in the same direction together. It’s communication of the spoken and the unspoken meaning your partner can compassionately sense what you need, and be there for you giving of his time, energy, and thoughts closest to his heart in response to your needs. In turn, you likewise respond to his needs. It’s a reciprocal interchange.
  • Spirituality – For religious couples spirituality strengthens their bonds because their actions toward each other are based on Bible principles to guide and direct them.
    For non-religious couples, spirituality means moral and ethical values such as honesty, kindness, goodness, love, faithfulness, self-control, peace, and so forth. These values anchor the relationship, solidly to a firm foundation.

And finally, your lover will accept you for who you are as an individual. He accepts the entire package. That means he accepts you with all your bumps and bruises, talents, goals, fears, courage, and idiosyncrasies. He both accepts and appreciates your uniqueness. And you accept him likewise. It’s a mutual interchange.

“When you love somebody, you got to love everything about them. You can’t just love the white part of the bread. You gotta love the crust, the crumbs, the tiny crumbs at the bottom of the toaster. That’s what the real mother***** is.” Chris Rock

 So true.

Did you get the point that while two people are separate individuals with their own uniqueness, when they enter into a relationship/ marriage, they no longer function as two—they function as ONE.

They are no longer two in the sense of each doing their own thing, contrary to the purpose of the team. You are now One in purpose for the family. You two are now One family sharing life as two best friends who each have value to contribute to this union as One.

“…and they will become one flesh…” The book of Genesis

That, ladies and gentlemen, is the formula of love in a nutshell.

Chemistry+Passion+Spirituality+Seeing+Team = True Love

I invite you to follow me to learn many more aspects of love and relationships.

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